Monday, February 6, 2017
On Relationships 1: Three theorems of a heathy relationship
So keen to figure out the mystery of Relationships, I have been reading books and experimenting the fundas of happy Relationships. Here are the three fundas, I articulated, that have endured the tests of my analytical mind.
These worked for me, many times. The might work or do not work for you. The world is not a monolith. But the key idea is experimenting and drawing our own experiences.
Read along and share your experiences and thoughts with me.
1. For a healthy relationship, the partners must accept the cardinal rule: There is no alternative. For a healthy relationship, the partners must never think that there is an option of separating. They have to stick to each other in all situations.
2. For a healthy relationship, the partners must adhere to this policy: The relationship is one-to-one and between two partners no-one should come. The partners should not involve a third party between them.
3. A healthy relationship thrives when the partners know and exercise this canon: There shouldn't be equality in relationship. For one, the other should be more respected.
On Relationships: My experiences & thoughts
The time passes by so fast you don't even realise. Lately, this realisation that I have almost 3 decades on Earth has been overwhelming. When I look back, I realise I have seen much of life. I have witnessed and contributed to the spectrum of human cultures.
However when I look ahead, I realise i have not yet seen a bit of the life on earth.
But I should pause sometimes and look back the experiences I had. The experiences that moulded my thoughts and helped mature them.
The one subject that comes first to my mind is Relationships. This subject has been closed my heart and eyes for 2 decades, soon after i became aware of myself and society.
The first decade was more of observing and looking through the glasses of self bhejo books on relationships, such as Men are from a Mars and Women are from Venus.
The past decade was more of actually experiencing them. These experiences have been very pleasant, deeply unpleasant, confusing, shaking, weakening, strengthening, and transforming.
I am not the same person I was 5 years ago. The experiences changed me. Unlike the changes that surroundings bring to your nature and behaviour in childhood, these changes couldn't go unnoticed by the present concious mind.
Many times, I felt I have understood the essence of Relationships and I can articulate the formulas for happy Relationships.
But I saw the inevitable failure of those formula in so many relationships and the implausibility of execution in real life, made me question the objective my observations.
It is not "Happy Relationships" anymore, it is "Enjoying the Relationships".
My learning might not apply to many others in apparently similar relationship. We may not always act as per the formulas. Sometimes we enjoy the pains of a relationship and do not act.
However, the effort to use the formula in life and generate new inferences is the greatest experience. We can call it Enjoying the Relationships.
In my next few posts, I'll share my experiences and thoughts with you.
Enjoy the life full of colours of Happiness, sadness, bliss, and dejection. Share your thoughts on my thoughts. Good Bye.